Love...
What happened to it
after the
Marriage Vows?
When you said your marriage vows on your wedding day you were so much in love…..right?You had such high expectations for a fulfilling, happy and satisfying life together with your new mate after saying your marriage vows.You might have thought ....”How difficult can it be? They are everything I dreamed of .I can’t help but think about them constantly.They fill my every thought. Since we have been dating, I have found them to be fun and exciting and they think so highly of me…it’s so perfect.Some things I love about them and some things I am not so crazy about but, who‘s perfect…..nobody is…right?They always call me on the phone and enjoy spending hours talking with me.
I know that everything will all work out OK.”
But then after a short time…6 months to a year later you find you and your spouse start having little marriage problems.Little things seem to upset you.You try to ignore them but they keep coming back.You then find yourselves slowly drifting apart.The exciting intimate sex you once shared together in the beginning has lost it's romance and passion. You both share negative words and comments to each other that sting and hurt.You begin building a wall between each other without even realizing it.You want things to change but you don’t know how.You both start finding busy things to do away from each other at work or out with friends.You avoid spending time together to eliminate communication that ends in fighting and arguing about anything and everything. You find you both begin experiencing a lack of interest in marriage altogether.You probably stop and ask yourself,
”How can this be,
not too long ago we were so much in love,
so happily married?”
It’s all her fault, It’s all his fault.Where did we go wrong?
How can we fix it?What can we do?
Marriage intimacy dwindles when couples do not know how to understand each other and fail to communicate to each other positively and begin addressing each other with negative comments.
If you were to look up marriage and divorce data on the internet, you would find some shocking information on the average duration of how long 1st, 2nd and 3rd marriages actually last.
Some couples choose to seek marriage help or marriage counseling and others feel after so many years “my marriage is broken” and give up trying to make it work all together and both end their relationship in divorce.
Some husbands and wives become so discouraged with the lack of love, romance and intimacy in their marriage that they lean on other male or female coworkers and before you know it an extramarital affair
begins which ends up causing even more heartaches and destruction.
We all know this need to find love outside the home has broken up many family relationships not just bringing more heartache to the husband and wife but also bringing heartache to the children. They grow up believing for most, if not all, of their entire life that this separation between mom and dad is somehow my fault.
But let me give you hope.
Your marriage is fixable. We can’t fix anything in life without the proper tools.You can’t fix a flat on your car without the proper tools.
To fix that flat tire you need a jack, a lug wrench and a spare tire and you are back on the road again headed to that vacation spot you love so much.So it is true with your marriage.With the proper tools you can and will experience marriage healing and restoration.Majority of couples experience problems in marriage.This is normal.Since men and women think differently and have different emotional thought processes at different time periods, of course there will be times they find there is disagreement and friction between each other.Again, this is normal.We all, and I mean all, just need to know what marriage tools to use at the proper time and at the proper moment to prevent these conflicts from creating walls within our hearts
between each other. These walls can, little by little, begin destroying our relationship with our mate whom we fell in love with
in the very beginning.
With the proper marriage tools, you can get back on the road of life with your marriage partner and experience the love and intimacy you both spoke of in your marriage vows.
